Fitness Update

So here's a fitness update for those of you keeping track at home.  I am doing FitOrbit with my former trainer, Amanda, who is a total stud and one of my fitness heroes.

I started with her about 4 weeks ago and I have lost a whopping 3 pounds so far (which I promptly put right back on and am now struggling to lose again).  But hey, that's a start!  And actually I have been building mad muscle.  My calves are looking pretty stacked again and just yesterday Sam was complimenting my shoulders and told me how much more toned they look since I started swimming once a week.  Imagine how amused I was when I told him that it wasn't from swimming once a week, it's from all the days I left weights and do Amanda's crazy circuits.  Hey, if he thinks swimming does it maybe it's not my place to burst his bubble.

My biggest challenges are portion control, snacking, and stress.  I do not handle stress well- I am a terrible emotional eater!  And even when I'm not overworked, under-slept or emotional drained, I still have a hard time stopping myself when I reach my portion limit.

The stress is a double whammy.  I am emotional so I am very likely to overeat and make poor food choices.  And on the other side of the coin, I never feel like exercising when I am really, really stressed.  The thought of having another "To Do List" item that needs checked off can really send me over the edge.

Earlier this week I was strapped and spread too thin working on a hard deadline for a project at work that involved going live with 28 new website pages for one of our newest products.  Sure enough, I was eating like I had PMS for about a week and I was working long hours and not spending as much time being active.  Now though, that's behind me.  And I am recommitting myself to the cause!

Not All Compliments Are Created Equal

I got home from work today and did my weigh lifting routine before heading to the gym.  I was a little later than usual (someone had to take a walk and do his business, Hunter!) but I figured it wouldn't be a big deal because our usual teacher wasn't out today.  Man, was I wrong.

I got to class and every single bike against the back wall was taken.  Every. Single. One.

Are you kidding me?  The one day I wear a snug-fitting Lululemon top to spin instead of a baggy t-shirt I am going to be on display to the people behind me.  Cue the self-consciousness.

I did what any girl would do- I immediately texted my girlfriends for support.  The responses were priceless.

My Texts:
Showed up late to spin today and couldn't get a back row bike- it's the first day I have worn a tight Lululemon (muffin top exposing) shirt.  FML.

Nobody stares at the ass in front of them... except me... right?

Turns out I am not the only one with a muffin top, thank God I have a nice rack.

Responses:
From Amy- "You have such great form that if anyone looks at your ass it's going to be because they are checking out your stance"

From Carina- "LOL ur all good.  Gym judgement is silly!!!"

From Sam- "That's what you get for having a muffin top!"

So what did I do?  I spun my little heart out!  I figured if I was going to be the chunky girl on the bike I could at least get a helluva workout in and have people respect me for that.  Our sub, who I've had before and I am convinced is a little nuts, is forevermore to be known as The Spin Nazi.  (Seinfeld shout-out!)  She is seriously hard work, but not as fun as Jen.

Well, about 10 minutes before class was over, I was sweating all over myself and prepping for an awesome finish to my workout.  I looked up and The Spin Nazi is totally grinning at me and mouthing something that seemed encouraging although I couldn't tell what she was saying.  The next thing I knew, she called me out for having great form.

Wow.  There is no higher compliment when you are working your butt off than to have the group fitness instructor acknowledge your amazingness in front of the entire class.  Yes, it's pretty damn rewarding.  And honestly, I worked even harder that last 10 minutes after she recognized my effort.

Girlfriends

Sometimes all that a girl needs is a day full of pampering with her girlfriends.

Sam was on call over night yesterday- he only has 3 calls left in his 2nd year of residency.  WOOHOO!

A last minute surprise, Carrie had the day off and decided to come down and visit for the day.  Carrie and I met in college, in a Spanish class during our junior year, and it turned out we were both Communications majors and had a couple of classes together for our major.  I think we took ALMOST every Communications class after that together- excluding the ones that one or the other had already taken.  She was a bright spot for me in school and since graduation I have really appreciating having Carrie and her fantastic family so close to Sam and I.  They have been so supportive of me and very welcoming and have always made me feel like I have family here in Southern California.

We had manicures in the morning at my favorite nail salon, grabbed lunch at The Counter (which is arguably my favorite burger place EVER), and then went down to my hair appointment with Jenn.  I'm a blond again!  I think Sam's happy but I'm REALLY blond- like it's going to take some getting used to for both of us.

We came home and took Hunter for a walk so I could get in my exercise.  I swapped the heavy cardio and weight lifting that I was supposed to do yesterday with the walk Amanda had scheduled for me today.  Even on my pampered days I can't take a day off from my health and fitness regiment.

We had a bit of a GNO after the appointment.  We went to The Daily Grill for dinner and picked up a dish for Sam that we brought over to him at the hospital.  Carrie hadn't ever been to the UCI Medical Center so Sam gave her the whole tour.

Being with Carrie made me feel so much better about all the stress in my life.  It is amazing what girlfriends can do for your happiness.

Now I'm exhausted from my workout and making dinner for us tonight and tomorrow night.  Hey, planning ahead is a good thing!  My legs still feel sore, but I do think I'm better off than had I skipped my workout and napped ALL afternoon.  As it was, I napped with Hunter for an hour before hitting the gym.

Anyway, here's to a great week!

Rejected

Five weeks ago I was hopeful.  I had been feeling restless about my future and wanted affirmation that
things were going to be okay and that I was headed in the right direction.  I thought I might be standing on the precipice of change.  I thought I wanted things to change.

In the weeks since I have been less and less sure that I desire a change.  There is so much comfort in what we know.  I waited patiently and impatiently depending on how my day was going.

Finally, I started convincing myself that the outcome doesn't matter.  My life is great, I am lucky and I don't need more than I have.

Today I the equivalent of a rejection letter from a college admissions office.  Wow.

I am surprised at how disappointed I am.  How personal the rejection is.  How much I want to go home and crawl into my bed and just escape to sleep.

Instead, I shoved my face full of white cheddar rice cakes and totally blew my calories for today on FitOrbit.  Smooth, Gi.  Real smooth.  Can you say "emotional eating" with me?  This is such a hurdle for me- I self-soothe with food.  It's a lose-lose for me.  Which is so frustrating!  I am upset and feel badly about myself and then I go and screw up my fitness plan which only makes me feel worse.  Cue the vicious, depressive cycle.

So what did I do?  I messaged Amanda and acknowledged that today I failed at something I hoped to succeed at.  And I owned my caloric SNAFU.  Yes, I overate today.  But am I going to throw in the towel, skip my workout, buy a pint of ice cream on the way home and wallow in my self-pity?

Hell no!

I am getting out of here and hitting the gym to complete my daily workout!  And then, I am going to eat  a healthy, balanced dinner- I am not going to make myself feel guilty and try to skip dinner.  (Yes, I really have done that before, but no, it is rarely successful and usually just means I am going to snack later.)  Today is ONE DAY in my week, month, year, life.  It's okay that it wasn't perfect, I have another chance tomorrow and life will go on.

Like Lead

So I started back with my amazing personal trainer from a couple of years ago, Amanda.  We make a fabulous team- she pushes me but is like a teammate not a drill sergeant.

So anyway, I have been trying (and failing) to lose weight on my own for about 16 months.  Due to some upcoming life events, Sam thought it would be nice to get me a personal trainer.  I think he was envisioning that I'd work out once a week with a trainer at our gym, but I had other plans.  I immediately texted Amanda and told her it was time to whip me back into shape.

These days (and actually, I think back when we were first training too) Amanda is doing online training via FitOrbit.  So I signed up.  I got online and I filled out the surveys and I submitted my credit card.  Woohoo!  So as of June 1, 2013 I am back on my health kick and fitness plan.

Let me tell you, it has not been easy.  Today for example, I was incredibly hungry.  Just ravenous.  Probably because I had a breakfast backfire where my intended meal was just not going to cut it.  So I tried to hold out until lunch but I ended up eating my lunch around 11, dozing off around 1, and having second lunch around 2.  Oops.

Good thing my workout tonight was INTENSE!  I did 30 minutes of Sculpt Cycle weights, walked Hunter for 40 minutes, and then hit up my new favorite Spin Class (Tuesday nights at LA Fitness with Jen).  Exhausted is an understatement.  I mean seriously.  I can barely move.

My arms are still sore from the insane "Just Push" arm circuit I did on Saturday morning.  Now I have legs like lead from my workouts yesterday and today.  I don't even know how I am going to take Hunter down for his before-bed potty walk.  I could have easily gone to soak in the jacuzzi for a while this evening... but I didn't have enough time.

Thankfully tomorrow is a pyramid swim set so I should have some chance of stretching out my arms and legs and doing some lengthening after all this tightening.  And since I'll already be down in the pool with my suit on I definitely foresee some soaking time so that my achy muscles can recover a bit.

Eye on the prize, kid.  Eye on the prize.

Love for Boston

This morning I was thinking good thoughts for my fitness mentor, personal trainer and (above all else) friend, Amanda, as she competed in the Boston Marathon.  I was so proud of her for overcoming the health obstacles she has faced during her training and was so impressed she had made the qualifying time.  Little did I know that a few short hours later I would be hearing harrowing reports of explosions near the finish line and wonder if she was one of the victims.

I am lucky to count the number of times I have really been worried about a friend's life on one hand.  Today, as I heard reports about the injured runners and spectators, I immediately thought of Amanda and her family.  I pulled up Facebook to check if she'd posted anything since the explosions and was preparing to send her a text message to check in on her when I saw on my newsfeed that she and her family were safe and sound and away from the danger zone.  Relief.  Completely and total relief.

I posted on my Facebook tonight: "I am so thankful that my Boston marathoner is safe, and my heart goes out the families and friends who weren't so lucky today."

After getting home this evening, I began pouring over the articles, images and video from the scene.  Nothing was more horrific than the video and images of the young man who had both legs blown off below the knee- his left tibia was exposed several inches where the flesh had completely been taken off before abruptly ending.  To say the scene was gruesome would not do it justice.

The thought that an 8-year old boy lost his life sickens me.  That child had his entire life ahead of him and thanks to the sociopath(s) behind this terrorism his bright future has been snuffed out.  How unbelievably tragic.  Just heart-wrenching.

Then there is this... the complete lack of humanity from the Westboro Baptist Church whose parish is threatening to boycott the funerals of the victims because they believe the bombings are directly related to Massachusetts's gay marriage laws.  WTF Westboro?  What is wrong with you!?  I believe in a forgiving God, a compassionate God, a God that would NOT kill an 8-year old boy because of gay-marriage laws.  It makes me sick.

And as I sat here venting to Sam about the horror that happened today, he looked at me and said, "Things like this happen all the time."  I was outraged.  I was offended.  And then I realized he speaks the truth.  Everyday Sam sees patients who have experienced tragedy- often at the fault of someone else.  Victims of car accidents, fireworks, stupid horseplay, etc. who watch their entire life change in an instant.  And many of those people are no different than the Boston marathoners; just going about their lives and then BAM- nothing will ever be the same.  Talk about putting things into perspective.  Right?  Makes my problems seem so insignificant!

So tonight, I am thankful for the health and safety of my loved ones in Boston and around the world.  I am thankful for the people who tended to the wounded and who sought to clear the area of other potentially harmful devices.  The ray of hope we experience in crisis is the humanity we see in the 'helpers'.

Cleanse: Take 2

So I'm doing another cleanse with my former (and still fabulous) personal trainer turned friend Amanda.  This time, however, I know that I am committed to a 7-day cleanse followed by an intense 30-days based on Jillian Michaels' book Making the Cut.

How is it going?  Well, I have to say that egg whites are NOT my favorite thing en mass.  I am supposed to be eating 6 each morning and I'm lucky if I can get 4 down.  It's not that I don't like eggs, but I am too lazy to get up early enough to make them and eat them at home.  Thus, I am bringing them to work and eating them when they are slightly cooled.  Not super appetizing as it turns out.

Other than the eggs though, things are going okay.  There is a LOT of variation with the meals on this plan compared with the one we did last year- but I do miss my heirloom tomato, arugula, hummus and Ezekiel bread sandwiches.  And, super plus, this one uses dandelion root tea to help purge extra water weight and reduce bloating.  Apparently dandelion tea has lots of benefits and is also used for detox purposes and it cleanses blood and improves organ health.  Who knew?!  It does taste a little earthy, but it's like ice cream compared to that horrible hemp protein powder I bought last year.  I had to replace that crap with Bluebonnet brand protein powder which was at least edible.

The only downside is that my energy is completely depleted.  Seriously.  Like I was sitting on the couch last night at 8:20 and was about to pass out so I made Sam put on True Blood so I could make it until at least 9:00.  (Side note: Sam started us on True Blood over the weekend and were on Season 2)

Anyway, not to dwell on the negatives or get off topic: the cleanse ends on Sunday and the real work begins on Monday.  Jillian Michaels has 30 days of food scheduled by meal for each kind of metabolism- fast, average, and slow.  According to the quiz I took, I have average metabolism and am a "B-group" person.

I have tried so many things to lose weight and my most successful thing was religiously following Weight Watchers.  I guess I am just hoping that I can lose the 10-20 pounds Jillian's method promises to shed and then I can get back to wearing my clothes better.  I just really want to get rid of the 20 pounds I've gained since I started working again in November 2011... preferably before Jackie's wedding on May 4 when I need to squeeze myself into a bridesmaid's dress and walk down an aisle.  Hmmmm, now that wedding season is around the corner I am thinking I probably should have been more serious about weight loss starting January 1 like I had hoped to be.  Better late than never I hope!

11 Questions

One of my high school friends tagged me for this and I thought I would give it a shot!

There are five simple rules:

1. Post these rules

2. Post a picture of yourself and 11 random things

3. Answer the questions set for you in the original post

4. Create 11 new questions and tag bloggers to answer them

5. Go to their blog or twitter and tell them you've tagged them

11 Questions for Me...

1. What is your favorite beauty product?

Right now, I am loving my  Clinique Even Better Liquid Foundation with SFP 15 Protection

2. What is your favorite word?

Love

3. If you could travel anywhere in the world where would it be?

I would go back to Thailand in a heartbeat.  Specifically, I would go back to Railay Bay & do a live-aboard SCUBA trip to the famous Similan Islands to swim with the Stingrays.  

4. Who is the most influential person in your life?

I cannot pick between my parents.  They have both shaped me into the person I am today, and I am eternally grateful for the time and energy they put into raising me. 

5. What are three words you would use to describe yourself?

Loyal, Passionate, and Caring

6. What makes you smile?

Lately, my Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Hunter

7. What are three things that you find to be calming?

Swimming, reading a good book, and snuggling on the couch

8. What would people be surprised to know about you?

As a high school senior I was a First Team All-American Water Polo player

9. What was your first car?

My mom's hand-me-down Toyota Camry Wagon, and my first new car was an Acura RSX.

10. Beach, mountains or desert?

Toss up between the Beach and the Mountains... the longer I live in Souther California the more the beach grows on me.  

11. What is your favorite thing to cook or bake?

Nonna's spaghetti and meatballs!

11 Questions for my Bloggers...

1. What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time?

2. Do you have any pets, if so, what kind and what are their names?

3. If you could live in any time throughout history, which time would you pick.

4. What's your favorite holiday?

5. What is the most important room in your home?

6. Do you prefer Macs or PCs?

7. What is your favorite kind of music?

8. Are you a pool person or a beach bum?

9. What is your dream job?

10. What's your favorite drink?

11. Would you rather live at the beach or in the snow?

Bloggers I Tagged

http://marlenaryan.blogspot.com/

http://afewthousandmiles.blogspot.com/

http://themandafesto.blogspot.com/

http://littletina.tumblr.com/

http://shesgoingdistance.blogspot.com/

http://aleftyinlondon.wordpress.com/

"Call Me Anything But Easy"

Amanda's last UCI spin class was tonight and I had a surprise for her...

I not only wanted to show off my shirt, but also a photo of Amanda since I have talked so highly of her.  She thinks she looks like crap, but her first spin class was at 5:30 this morning, she worked with clients all day, and this photo was after her 6:30pm spin class, so let's all cut her some slack.  The back of the shirt says, "Call her anything but easy," which I would say is one of my favorite Amanda Ebner quotes followed closely by, "here's the business," and "don't be afraid to get a little reckless."  Let me also say looks are deceiving.  Amanda may appear cute and nice, but she is guareenteed to kick your a$$ for the full hour you work out with her.  Post my Amanda workout nights I am most often in bed doing homework aka falling asleep with my book open like I will probably be doing in a few minutes.

Body By Amanda

With a very heavy heart, I walked home from the gym tonight after my last (for a while) in-person workout with my personal trainer, Amanda.  In the last 18 months she has pushed me beyond my limits, taught me new training techniques, and encouraged me stick with Weight Watchers since for me, diet is a more challenging lifestyle component than exercise.  Amanda trained me for my first (possibly only) 5K, turned me on to studio cycling classes, and supported my with out-of-the-gym struggles.  After making the decision to leave the graduate program at UCI in order to train full time, she is now scaling back her commute to increase her client volume.  I am so happy for her and wish her all the success in the world. 

From now until Sam and I leave for Southeast Asia, I’ll be training online with Amanda- completing the programs she gives me and reporting back to her the stats.  I can't believe I won't be seeing her twice a week, but I’m comforted to know that we’ll be able to work together online no matter where I move in June ( LA looks pretty appealing from the perspective of fulfilling my fitness needs.)

Before Amanda, and after Amanda

I know it was my blood, sweat tears that got me here, but Amanda made that possible.  She put in the time and effort creating challenging workouts, setting new goals for me, and reminding me that I am capable of accomplishing anything I set my mind to.  I can say this, “Amanda, our work together has not been easy, ever.  But it has been the most rewarding personal journey of my life, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.”