Welcome to Orange County Fall!

My little guy is such a handsome puppy!

Fall has finally arrived here in Irvine and I couldn't be happier!  

Fall makes me think of Northern California and I love celebrating the change of the seasons.  And now that we're into October, Sam and I are anticipating Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas.  

It rained yesterday for the first time this fall and it was magical.  The smell of the wet pavement and dirt.  The way the air has a bite and chill to it.  Maybe this fall is especially magical because I'm celebrating my engagement to the most amazing future-husband in the world.  

And wedding planning is going fantastically.  This week we pulled the trigger on a videographer and a DJ/Emcee who will also handle our lighting.  So now we've got a couple more big things crossed off our list.  The only things that we have left are to decide on an officiant, string trio or quartet for the ceremony, the cake, our menu, a hairdresser, a makeup artist and my wedding dress.

My sister is going to be in NorCal this weekend and she and my mom and I are going to check out a bridal salon that has "the dress".  There's been one dress in all my perusing that I keep coming back to and thinking that it's just perfect.  Yes, I'm nervous about what will happen when I put it on, but I am really excited to share this moment with my mom and sister.

The Guest List

So far, the worst part about wedding planning is, without a doubt, the guest list.  Obviously we have two families that need to be accommodated as well as ten years worth of mutual friends and two lifetimes of best friends.  It all adds up to a lot of people.

And that is the crux of our dilemma.  Where to make the cuts.  Where are the natural dividing lines of social circles?  As the bride, I feel like it's my responsibility to bridge the gap between my parents and Sam, who in turn will have to head up the conversations with his parents.  It's a well-rehearsed, choreographed dance that Sam and I are managing these days.  I suppose all couples go through a bit of this, especially with a fixed budget and limited venue capacity, but that doesn't ease my anxiety.

I am still in the honeymoon phase of wedding planning; I want to please everyone.  I am told by former brides that this phase will wear off... and hopefully that will happen soon.  I can't imagine going through the next 10 months of planning trying to make my mom, Sam's mom, Sam and I happy.  That sounds completely exhausting!

So for now, as we try to cut our list down to the maximum venue capacity, I am torn between making Sam and I happy, making my parents happy, and making Sam's parents happy.

Wedding Planning Whirlwind

Last weekend was a whirlwind of wedding planning. I picked my mom up at John Wayne on my way home from dropping Sam off at LAX. He’s in Thailand with his parents this week visiting his brother. 

Mom and I stayed up well past midnight looking through The Knot’s quarterly magazine that Carrie brought down for me last weekend. We also went online and perused a bunch of invitations and get a feel for what we liked. Luckily, Mom and I both liked the more formal invitations and she agreed that it would be cute to have something with some kind of beach theme. 

Saturday morning she wanted to get her nails done at my local nail salon, so I took her in there after breakfast. When she was finished, we headed over to South Coast Plaza to check out the Papyrus store and see what they had to offer as far as invitations go. As we were flipping through books, Mom found the PERFECT invitations. They are very clean and elegant, the wording is very formal, and they have a starfish accent at the bottom of the invitation. I’ll have to take Sam back in a few weeks and make sure he likes them too, but I don’t think he’ll have too much of a problem with them!

After the invitations, we headed home and had lunch with Hunter. He was happy to see us and spend some time getting spoiled while we were getting ready for our appointment at The Surf and Sand.

Ironically, the photographer and florist I have booked for my wedding were at The Surf and Sand on Saturday doing another wedding. It was fun to meet the photographer, who I booked through her boss, and hadn’t met yet. The florist wasn’t there in person, but Mom did get to see the flowers she did.

We also got to meet our wedding coordinator, Kat. She helped us figure out what our wedding costs would be and answered a bunch of our questions before I signed the contract and Mom handed over her credit card. During our meeting, Kat had us sample the house champagne and we got calamari comped by the resort. It was really nice, and obviously, since we’re going to pay a LOT for this wedding, I am sure they were doing their best to impress us.

After the business was done, Mom and I wandered around the hotel so she could get a better feel for it. We went down to the beach so that Mom could get an idea of where our wedding photos will be taken, and while we were there we got to see the photographers taking photos of the bridal party. It was really fun.

After we were done at the Surf & Sand, we walked across the street to Laguna Brisas, The Best Western hotel we are getting a special rate at for our guests. Mom and I hadn’t been in there before, and we checked it out just to make sure everything was on par- which it was! 

We headed home at 8pm… pretty impressive since we got up 12 hours earlier!

On Sunday, we conferred with Dad about the best way to communicate all the hotel information to our guests on the wedding website. After sorting that out, Mom and I went down to Fashion Island to do a little shopping. It was funny, because we’re trying to figure out if coral or turquoise bridesmaids’ dresses will be prettier. I would love to find something in Tiffany Blue to match the colors of The Surf and Sand, but we’ll see how that goes. Anyway, while we were shopping both colors were EVERYWHERE! They were on the racks in the stores and on the people wandering around the mall. It was hilarious.

After lunch at R&D Kitchen, I dropped Mom off at the airport. 

It was kind of strange to see her go since I’m now home alone with Hunter all week while Sam’s out of town. Not that I mind it so much, but we had a really nice time while she was here and it was all SO easy! Nonna said she once heard planning a wedding compared to planning the invasion of Normandy and that's been our running joke for about a year now.  I just hope the rest of the planning process goes this smoothly and the day goes off with minor hitches!!!

Late last night, I was watching The Newsroom and texting with Carina about my dress and everything Mom and I accomplished. I wish Carina had been here, but it’s been really fun bonding with her on Pinterest posts and texts and phone calls. I think this is going to be a really fun experience for us as sisters. J

As I was walking Hunter, Dad called to say that he and Mom were going through their guest list and he wanted to add another 8 people who he felt would be offended if they weren’t invited. He said it’s not likely these people will pay to travel down here, but who knows, they might. He said he’ll send an email out to let everyone know that they shouldn’t worry about offending him if they can’t make it, but that he wanted them to know they are in the VIP circle of friends. I told Dad that since he is paying for all of this, I don’t care who he invites. As long as we stay under the max capacity of the ball room and can afford for all these wild people to come and suck booze down at the open bar, I feel like the more the merrier is our motto!

Papa Santi Turns 80

Yesterday my grandpa threw himself an 80th birthday part at my parent's house.  Sam, my sister and I flew in from our respective places of residence, Ali and her boyfriend came up from Santa Barbara and Mark, Lori and Brock came over from Hawaii.  It was quite an event.  Papa invited 60 people and we think we had about 55 attend.  

He hired a team to cook (in GIANT propane powered pots) lobster, veggies, potatoes, and garlic.  It was our own private lobsterfest.  They rolled parchment paper out on these long tables and then dumped the food out on the middle of the tables and everyone pretty much sat down and ate with their hands.  It was pretty fun- except of course that some of us don't eat lobster so much.  Which was a real treat for those of us who DO eat lobster.  :-)  Sam ate my tail and one of my claws while I stuck to the corn and shrimp.  He also was a HUGE help manning the bar with Carina.  They were fantastic!

I took a TON of photos with Papa's camera- hopefully they will turn out well.  Hopefully Nonna and Papa will remember to have a disk made for me when they have the photos printed.

It was good to see Ali and Brock- I loved catching up with them!  Mark and Lori were fun too, and I al so glad they all came over around 2:30 so that we could spend some time with just the family before the guests arrived.  We broke in the bar and had a couple beers to take the edge off while playing some friendly family ping-pong matches.  Ali's boyfriend, Peter, ripped his jeans open at the crotch which was HILARIOUS and he ended up borrowing a pair of Dad's shorts so that he was decent for the party.

Once the party was in full-swing there were SO many people I didn't have as much time to hang out with them.  C'est la vie.  I hope that we're going to be able to hang out with them soon.  I'm sure we'll see Peter and Ali since they only live 2 1/2 hours from us by car and should be able to come down and visit one weekend before Peter graduates in December. 

One of my favorite photos of the afternoon was the one of Sam, Carina and I in our bibs (provided by the lobster company) to try to keep our clothes clean.  They reminded me of the "I <3 Pasta" bibs Nonna used to have for us at the holidays.  

Along with the family, it was wonderful to see so many old friends.  I really enjoyed spending time with the Cantys, Geoghegans and Williams- Maria and Pat especially.  They are such amazing people and have always treated me like a part of their family.  Gosh they are just the best.  

Like Carina said last night after everyone had gone home and it was just us five, we are incredibly lucky to have been dealt the hand we were given.  We have a great family and great friends. 

Respect for Military Families

Mom and Dad arrive tomorrow for the next wedding (Wedding Season 2013 may be our busiest yet) of the year.  Their Goddaughter is getting married in San Juan Capistrano kind of at the last minute because her fiancee has been deployed to the coast of North Korea (I think) and he will be shipping out prior to their original wedding date.

This is actually the second couple I have personally known who've had to change their wedding plans based on a change in deployment plans.  It's just really tough to think that you'd plan so much for this day and spend all this money and then something so huge comes up that is completely out of your control and you just have to go with it.  No questions asked.  No temper tantrums.  You give everything up and just make it work.

Military families, especially wives and husbands, are so fascinating to me.  I mean seriously, we talk about how strong and resilient the men and women in the armed forces are but the real strength is the people who are left here.  The people who keep the homes and families running all on their own.  Man, I am so impressed.  

I complain about medical school and residency but I am so thankful Sam won't ever have to ship out at the last minute and be away for months at a time.  Yes, our long distance relationship in college was hard, but by the time we were 21 we agreed we didn't want to do anything like that again.  And Sam may go off for a month and do away rotations abroad at some point, but it will be planned and very premeditated- and I can always go visit him!

Thanks, Mom!

I am blessed to have one of the greatest mothers I have met- and I know some pretty amazing moms.  My mom has always been a great role model for me. She taught me to be kind, patient, and understanding.  She taught me the importance of empathy and being mindful of how others feel.  I learned the real meaning of compassion as I watched her take impeccable care of her aging parents as they succumbed to cancer and dementia.  She taught me the importance of thinking before speaking, making good first impressions and standing up for my beliefs.  She instilled in me good values and morals and she taught me to cherish family and appreciate home-cooked meals.

Above all things, Mom taught me to love unconditionally.  Yes, Dad gets credit too.

My mom has done a wonderful job of letting me grow up over the years.  She has watched me make mistakes and helped me learn from them.  She has accepted my tattoos, piercings and major life decisions with unwavering support.

Meeting Dwight Clark in Feb '13

I have not always made great decisions (boy does it concern me to put that in writing!)  but my mom has always been there to help me out when the house of cards came crashing down or to congratulate me when everything worked out the way I hoped it would.

She has encouraged me to think for myself, prioritize my goals and chase my dreams.

I have a wonderful mother.

I also have a great cast of supporting mothers who have helped her out along the way- some she's know and some she hasn't.

To my Aunts (Lori, Annie & Kathy): Thank you for being part of my whacky family.  I know we're not perfect, but let's face it, we embrace our dysfunction and roll with it.  I am lucky to have you in my life and I appreciate the motherly advice you've given me when I have come to you instead of Mom.

To Denise VanKuiken: Big Props to you NeeCee!  You are one of the strongest moms I know and I am incredibly lucky to consider you my surrogate mother.  I think of you often and wish we lived closer so that I could spend more time with you.

To Sue Celniker: Thank you for Sam.  You raised a wonderful, handsome young man and I am forever grateful for all of your hard work and energy.  You have also shown me what it is to successfully juggle motherhood and an thriving career.  Thank you for supporting me and encouraging me as I have stumbled along my career path.

To Janie Rutman, Debbie Grant & Monica Nageotte: Thank you so much for making me feel as though I have a mom here in Southern California.  It has been a pleasure spending holidays and afternoons with you ladies these past several years and I appreciate being made to feel as though I'm part of your family.

To my mom-friends: Thank you for paving the way for me!  I enjoy seeing you with your little rascals and seeing your struggles.  You are showing me the real world of parenting and have helped me understand my own mother better.

Thank you all for helping me be the young woman I am today- I love you all! xo

In the SuperDome in New Orleans for our first Super Bowl (Feb '13)

Rose Bowl Parade

Mom wanted lots of photos of the parade... especially of the flowers up close.  Here are some of my favorites from the 400+ photos taken New Year's Day!

Theme of the 2013 Rose Parade

Hawaiian Riders

Shriners Float (for Uncle Mark!)

Queen of the Roses and her court

Stanford Band- go Giants! 

B2 Bomber cruised the parade & the field before teh game

Organ Donation Float (for Denise!)

They got married during the parade!