The Guest List

So far, the worst part about wedding planning is, without a doubt, the guest list.  Obviously we have two families that need to be accommodated as well as ten years worth of mutual friends and two lifetimes of best friends.  It all adds up to a lot of people.

And that is the crux of our dilemma.  Where to make the cuts.  Where are the natural dividing lines of social circles?  As the bride, I feel like it's my responsibility to bridge the gap between my parents and Sam, who in turn will have to head up the conversations with his parents.  It's a well-rehearsed, choreographed dance that Sam and I are managing these days.  I suppose all couples go through a bit of this, especially with a fixed budget and limited venue capacity, but that doesn't ease my anxiety.

I am still in the honeymoon phase of wedding planning; I want to please everyone.  I am told by former brides that this phase will wear off... and hopefully that will happen soon.  I can't imagine going through the next 10 months of planning trying to make my mom, Sam's mom, Sam and I happy.  That sounds completely exhausting!

So for now, as we try to cut our list down to the maximum venue capacity, I am torn between making Sam and I happy, making my parents happy, and making Sam's parents happy.

Wedding Planning

I am so incredibly excited to be a bride!  Obviously this is (hopefully) the experience of a lifetime for any couple, and Sam and I have been waiting a really long time for this.  From the invitations to the decorations to the food to the cake to the hotels our guests are going to stay at - I am really excited to do everything!  

So far planning the invasion of Normandy (which is what my Nonna and I are affectionately calling the wedding planning process) has been going really smoothly.  I suppose that we're lucky because we already started this whole process so many months ahead of time but here's some of the stuff we're thinking of:

Football Season 2013

This is going to be a very bittersweet football season for me.  As you (hopefully) know, my family has had season tickets to the 49ers since Kezar Stadium, and at the end of this season, the 49ers current stadium at Candlestick Park will be torn down.  The new stadium will be built in Santa Clara, and it looks to be quite a work of art.  Unfortunately, Papa's seats on the 45 yard line, 15 rows up behind the 49ers bench were going to be $80,000 a piece for the personal seat licenses (PSLs) - that doesn't even include the price of the tickets!

So, Papa gave up his seats.  Dad is going to have one seat in the upper deck with some of his friends from high school, who we tailgate with every Sunday.  The plan is to buy tickets comparable to what we are accustom to when we want to go to games, and even if we were to spend $2,000 for all 6 (now 7, with Sam) of us to go together, it would be significantly cheaper than buying season tickets that we don't even use every week because we only have 4 family members currently living in the Bay Area.

What makes this season especially tough is that we were so close to our 6th Super Bowl victory last February and I was incredibly invested in the season as you can see here, here, here, and especially here in NOLA.  This year we have another great team, and it's going to be really tough to say goodbye to The Stick when it just seems to feel like we're returning to our glory days.

My Side Kick

My constant companion throughout all the wedding planning and organizing has been little Hunter.

He is so patient and loving and affectionate... I couldn't imagine a better side kick!  Especially since Sam has been busy with work and on vacation since we got engaged.  And Hunter obviously loves every decision I make.  :-)

But seriously, tonight as I was copying 100 to-do items from The Knot website to an excel spreadsheet to send off to both sets of parents, Hunter hung out right next to me.  He snuggled up with me, he played a little fetch and when Sam had to go into the hospital to admit a patient, Hunter curled up and went to sleep next to me.

Create Something Awesome

Seth Godin wrote a post that I couldn't agree more with: Perhaps you could just make something awesome instead.

I often feel like there is a lot of pressure put on marketers to manipulate the facts about a product or service to drum up interest and generate sales.  I understand that's part of my job, but I believe that is only to an extent.  I do not believe in trying to get people to buy into a lie.

I would much prefer that we just make something awesome instead, something that doesn't need to be 'spun' in a positive light.  It's kind of like the articles poking fun at Microsoft for all their smear campaigns putting down Apple products.  Can't they just talk about how great the Microsoft products are instead?  Maybe they can't.  And consumers are smart enough to perceive when brands are being evasive and trying to put down the competition to stay relevant.

Thankfully, I don't have to do much faking it with my marketing, but I am painfully aware that some of my colleagues do.

Margaux's Bachelorette Weekend

I have been getting over a cold for the last two weeks and here I sit on the eve of a major girls weekend extravaganza in Santa Barbara.

Miss Margaux is getting married next month and she invited me to join she and her girlfriends for a bachelorette weekend, which is a real honor.  I have come to think of Margaux as part of my own family and the other longstanding girlfriend in Sam's family to share in the limo between being a part of the family du jure and being part of the family de facto.

Margaux is far more patient that I am, she waited 17 years for Pete to propose to her.

In charge of our weekend festivities is one of Margaux's dearest friends whom I enjoy immensely- Ingrid.  She is a UCSB graduate along with her husband, Sam, so I know we're going to do be in great hands.  It will also be interesting to see a mature bachelorette party, since I think this is more in line with how I'd like to celebrate next year.

It should be a great weekend, especially since it will be a long weekend vacation.  We're all taking tomorrow off to travel up in the morning and hanging out by the pool in the afternoon.  I just hope I can keep up with these ladies and not relapse with my head cold.

I also can't wait to get back home on Sunday and see Sam!  He gets back from Thailand on Saturday night and will get a warm welcome from Hunter before being on call on Sunday.  Hopefully it will be a quiet night and he'll be able to spend some time at home after I get here.

All Alone at Home

Okay, so here I am by myself.  Well I am hanging out with Hunter, so I'm not really alone.

I have been spending lots of time wedding planning with my family and married girlfriends.  It has been a complete blast!

That said, I do miss Sammy.  I am excited for him to come home this weekend and check out the invitations and the website and hear about all the cool stuff we're going to have at our wedding.  SO EXCITED!

I am just really looking forward to all the fun we're going to have over the next year and throughout our lifetime!

And for the first time in my life, I have started watching Say Yes To The Dress.  OMG, what has become of me!?!  I guess this is what I get since Sam accidentally took my laptop to Thailand instead of his own!!!

Building Gardens

This post, Gardens, not Buildings by Seth Godin really resonated with me.

I feel like I have always wanted to cross things off of my list.  Whether it's a work task or a personal task, I get immense satisfaction from accomplishing my goals.

This mentality has been tough to overcome since I started managing a website in my current job.  Websites are not projects that get completed, they are always evolving and changing.  I have had to stop building structures and walking away, as Seth puts it.  I am cultivating a garden that needs constant attention, adjustment and fine-tuning.

Sage Advice from Ashton Kutcher!

Had to share this... good job Chris!


And to think I thought I couldn't like Ashton Kutcher more than I already did!

Wedding Planning Whirlwind

Last weekend was a whirlwind of wedding planning. I picked my mom up at John Wayne on my way home from dropping Sam off at LAX. He’s in Thailand with his parents this week visiting his brother. 

Mom and I stayed up well past midnight looking through The Knot’s quarterly magazine that Carrie brought down for me last weekend. We also went online and perused a bunch of invitations and get a feel for what we liked. Luckily, Mom and I both liked the more formal invitations and she agreed that it would be cute to have something with some kind of beach theme. 

Saturday morning she wanted to get her nails done at my local nail salon, so I took her in there after breakfast. When she was finished, we headed over to South Coast Plaza to check out the Papyrus store and see what they had to offer as far as invitations go. As we were flipping through books, Mom found the PERFECT invitations. They are very clean and elegant, the wording is very formal, and they have a starfish accent at the bottom of the invitation. I’ll have to take Sam back in a few weeks and make sure he likes them too, but I don’t think he’ll have too much of a problem with them!

After the invitations, we headed home and had lunch with Hunter. He was happy to see us and spend some time getting spoiled while we were getting ready for our appointment at The Surf and Sand.

Ironically, the photographer and florist I have booked for my wedding were at The Surf and Sand on Saturday doing another wedding. It was fun to meet the photographer, who I booked through her boss, and hadn’t met yet. The florist wasn’t there in person, but Mom did get to see the flowers she did.

We also got to meet our wedding coordinator, Kat. She helped us figure out what our wedding costs would be and answered a bunch of our questions before I signed the contract and Mom handed over her credit card. During our meeting, Kat had us sample the house champagne and we got calamari comped by the resort. It was really nice, and obviously, since we’re going to pay a LOT for this wedding, I am sure they were doing their best to impress us.

After the business was done, Mom and I wandered around the hotel so she could get a better feel for it. We went down to the beach so that Mom could get an idea of where our wedding photos will be taken, and while we were there we got to see the photographers taking photos of the bridal party. It was really fun.

After we were done at the Surf & Sand, we walked across the street to Laguna Brisas, The Best Western hotel we are getting a special rate at for our guests. Mom and I hadn’t been in there before, and we checked it out just to make sure everything was on par- which it was! 

We headed home at 8pm… pretty impressive since we got up 12 hours earlier!

On Sunday, we conferred with Dad about the best way to communicate all the hotel information to our guests on the wedding website. After sorting that out, Mom and I went down to Fashion Island to do a little shopping. It was funny, because we’re trying to figure out if coral or turquoise bridesmaids’ dresses will be prettier. I would love to find something in Tiffany Blue to match the colors of The Surf and Sand, but we’ll see how that goes. Anyway, while we were shopping both colors were EVERYWHERE! They were on the racks in the stores and on the people wandering around the mall. It was hilarious.

After lunch at R&D Kitchen, I dropped Mom off at the airport. 

It was kind of strange to see her go since I’m now home alone with Hunter all week while Sam’s out of town. Not that I mind it so much, but we had a really nice time while she was here and it was all SO easy! Nonna said she once heard planning a wedding compared to planning the invasion of Normandy and that's been our running joke for about a year now.  I just hope the rest of the planning process goes this smoothly and the day goes off with minor hitches!!!

Late last night, I was watching The Newsroom and texting with Carina about my dress and everything Mom and I accomplished. I wish Carina had been here, but it’s been really fun bonding with her on Pinterest posts and texts and phone calls. I think this is going to be a really fun experience for us as sisters. J

As I was walking Hunter, Dad called to say that he and Mom were going through their guest list and he wanted to add another 8 people who he felt would be offended if they weren’t invited. He said it’s not likely these people will pay to travel down here, but who knows, they might. He said he’ll send an email out to let everyone know that they shouldn’t worry about offending him if they can’t make it, but that he wanted them to know they are in the VIP circle of friends. I told Dad that since he is paying for all of this, I don’t care who he invites. As long as we stay under the max capacity of the ball room and can afford for all these wild people to come and suck booze down at the open bar, I feel like the more the merrier is our motto!

ENGAGED!

Last Saturday (7/27/13) Sam took me by surprise and flew me in a helicopter to Catalina Island.  

After breakfast, he rented a golf cart and we toured the island.  

Above Descanso Beach, he asked me to marry him!!!

He even had champagne to celebrate.

The biggest shock of the day, was when our friends showed up on a sailboat to take us out for drinks, play a game of mini golf, and then sail us home.

BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!